After more than 32 years of dedicated service Sergeant Raymond 'Tod' Mackinnon served his last day with the NSW Police Force last week.
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On Thursday, April 20 he left the Southern Highlands Police Station for the last time, marching through a guard of honour.
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"It was a great day, and it was not something that I wanted. I wanted to walk away peacefully," Sgt MacKinnon said.
"My attitude was that they paid me every fortnight to do a job that I loved. I walked past Revesby Police Station aged four and said to my mother 'I'm going to be a policeman one day'.
"What they did for me on my last day was really beautiful but unnecessary," he said.
He said there were "many tears" when he announced to the team that he would be leaving the service.
In his 32-year career Sgt Mackinnon worked in crash investigation, police driver training, and the Traffic and Highway Patrol Command.
"I moved around quite a bit. I joined in 1991 and was originally stationed in general duties in Blacktown in Sydney. From there I went to the highway patrol at Cabramatta and then I ended up at a taskforce in Parramatta," he said.
"I've done Sydney, Tamworth, Bathurst, Mudgee and Goulburn, and I got to Moss Vale in December 2018."
Among the many accolades Sgt MacKinnon has received were awards for his service during the 2000 Sydney Olympics and the National Medal for his efforts during emergencies and natural disasters. He was also acknowledged for his dedication after saving the life of a woman at Mount Panorama.
He said to walk away from policing was a difficult decision to make.
"I'm 64 years of age and done 32 years of policing so 50 per cent of my life has been policing," Sgt MacKinnon said.
"It was a difficult thing to walk away from. You kind of feel like you've lost you. You've lost a part of yourself and walking away from good friends who you've trusted with your life, it's difficult."
On the key moments that stand out to him, Sgt MacKinnon said there were simply "so many".
"I spent seven years in crash investigation just doing fatal after fatal after fatal after fatal, so I think that probably stands out most in my life," he said.
"I can remember the people, places and things. They're things that you will never forgot. You see things that people should never have to see. But I've worked with some great people, I really have.
"I've worked with some people who have inspired me to keep going and I've worked with people who are intelligent and you just want to be like them," Sgt MacKinnon said.
On how policing shaped his personal life, he said it "absolutely" changed how he parented.
"I know when my children were growing up; when I joined the police my daughter wasn't born and my son was only two, but as they were growing up through life and being in the police you realise you can't trust everybody," Sgt MacKinnon said.
"And seeing some of the things that you see, you do become a more strict parent. You do watch your children more closely, which is sad because I don't think it gives them the true value of life because you seem to be mothering them all the time and watching and wondering where they are and who they're with."
Earlier this year Sgt MacKinnon realised that for 32 years he had spent every Christmas, Easter, school holidays and public holidays "keeping other people's families alive".
"It's time for my family," he said.
"I just want to dedicate some time to my family and to give back to them for all the times that I haven't been around for those social functions that they've attended alone and school events that I never got to."
That family includes his wife of 36 years and a 34-year-old son and a 32-year-old daughter, and two grandchildren who were present at his passing out parade.
"We don't acknowledge our partners enough because my wife, especially through all my crash years, saw me at my worst, and she saw me at my very best," Sgt MacKinnon said.
"When I thought that I had nothing left to give she was the one who pushed me to keep going. We just don't acknowledge them enough because while I was away being called out at all hours of the night who was running the house?"
Southern Highland News asked Sgt MacKinnon if he would he do it all again?
"Yes, and I would encourage anybody to get in and have a go because if you think you're not capable of doing it, you surprise yourself. I've just had a ball," he said.
"I think it's the nature of the work where you depend on those around you. It's so much like the military, if you don't have good people around you, you're on your own. When your back's up against the wall, you're looking to your colleagues."
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