Teaching a child right from wrong is important in their development. It is integral to their ability to assimilate in society both as a child and as an adult. It is the start of learning that there are rules that need to be followed throughout life and repercussions for those who break those rules.

But few would argue that, at times, setting boundaries or rules for children and then developing a way to enforce those rules can truly tug at the heart strings of a parent.

There are also many opinions and suggestions.

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To smack or not to smack is always a big debate with plenty of opinion on both sides. For the purpose of this article I won't be entering that discussion.

I will, however, look at some other options which I have used. Some have worked...some not so much.

Early in my life as a parent I attempted the option of counting to three in an effort to warn my child that they needed to change their behaviour about a situation and to give them time to make that change. I tried it and it went something like this: "One, two, two and a quarter, two and a half..." I continued resorting to a variety of other fractions as well. All because I had no idea what I was going to do when I reached three. I'd watched other parents use this method and I guess I tried it with blind hope.

Clearly I didn't think this one out very well.

Then there was the naughty corner for time out.

This was a reasonable option for my children - although again I was not great at it. I would get busy with other things and forget to call an end to the time out. But most of the time I would fail to enforce the time out and my children would ultimately release themselves from this disciplinary measure at their leisure.

Sending them to their room for a period of time was another penalty for poor behaviour that I considered. But of course I soon realised this was hardly a punishment as the bedrooms were like a theme park - full of fun things to do.

Then there was the restrictive style of punishment. No, I don't mean tie them up. I mean the type of punishment where you take away their favourite toy for a day, or week. Or alternatively you stop them from doing an activity they really wanted to do.

This was reasonably effective but the inability to play with a particular toy soon lost its impact. After all there were many other fun things in the toy box.

Raising my voice was another option but virtually ineffective. Now I know I can be loud and I can muster up a scary tone. However, I think my bellowing voice is similar to a high pitch noise - only dogs can hear it. Well at least that's what I have decided, as it seemed to have little impact for disciplinary purposes in my home.

Finally I came up with a few ideas that had the desired impact to relay a message to my children that there were solid consequences for poor behaviour.

For the record, my children were not excessively naughty, but as with any child they sometimes pushed the boundaries. I had come up with the perfect solution to deal with the behaviour.

I gave them chores. For example, fighting with their siblings meant they all got a chore - usually in separate rooms to help ease the tension of the sibling clash at the time.

The chore created a distraction while helping me around the house. And by the time they had finished their chore they had time to think about their behaviour.

From time to time I also turned their own responses back on them.

An example was when my son was asked to do something and he repeatedly replied "in a minute." So when it was time for us to head off to one of his activities I used the same response.

He said, "Mum, I'm ready to go."

I responded with, "In a minute."

He missed that activity on that particular day, but he also learnt to do what he was asked, when he was asked.

Now what I share next may not meet the approval of all, but I can assure it was used as a visual warning not as a follow-through action, and all in the name of safety.

You see, my youngest was like Houdini as a toddler in her car seat. No matter how firm the seat belt was she could wriggle her way out. Meanwhile, I was driving in the front seat trying to focus on the road. Her escape artist act was a distraction that was not at all conducive to safety.

I tried a number of warnings and threats of being sent to her room when we got home...all to no avail.

In the end I put a bottle of hot sauce in the centre console of my car. She had tried this before - it was a favourite of her Dad but the mini Houdini did not like it. I warned her that if she tried to get out of her car seat I would put the sauce on her tongue. Needless to say the escape routine came to abrupt halt.

Mumma Jak has three children and is familiar with the challenges of parenthood. She is well aware that every child is different, every day can be different and a parent's approach needs to be different according to the situation at hand. She is happy to say she fumbled through, motivated from the perfect starting point - unconditional love. The good news is that all three of her children have become normal functioning adults.

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