Farewell to a decent man in Across the River with Geoff Goodfellow | February 15

WHEN well known local resident, Bill Missingham died last month and the Southern Highlands lost a very decent man.

William Johnstone (Bill) Missingham was a former Wingecarribee Shire Councillor, sawmiller, farmer, Robertson Show committee member and sportsman who had a mighty fine reputation around these parts. He spent most of his life at Robertson where the family produced four generations of sawmillers working out there in the bush winning timber. Bill was born in 1927 and the Missingham family first came to Robertson in 1883, so I reckon we can safely call him a local. Young Bill followed his father, another Bill Missingham, on the council. And he had followed his father John Missingham. Altogether these three generations of Missinghams contributed around 75 years of representation in local government. No other Highlands family I know of has such a record. Bill didn't stand for office again following the amalgamation of Mittagong, Bowral and the old Wingecarribee councils in 1981. He was a lovely bloke and a very honest, diligent councillor. Salt of the earth really.

END OF AN ERA: This was the last of the old Wingecarribee Councils before amalgamation in 1981. At the back are Bill Naylor (Health and Building chief), Richie Tebbutt, Tim McKinnon, Harold Jopling (shire clerk), Horace Quigg, Roy Baker (shire engineer). At the front are Rachel Roxburgh, Laurie Jones, Geoff Larsen (shire president), Bill Engelbach and Bill Missingham.

END OF AN ERA: This was the last of the old Wingecarribee Councils before amalgamation in 1981. At the back are Bill Naylor (Health and Building chief), Richie Tebbutt, Tim McKinnon, Harold Jopling (shire clerk), Horace Quigg, Roy Baker (shire engineer). At the front are Rachel Roxburgh, Laurie Jones, Geoff Larsen (shire president), Bill Engelbach and Bill Missingham.

SITTING beside Bill Missingham in this 1980 photograph is Bill Engelbach, who was quite a character. He would regularly phone me at council office and ask; "So what is happening in Fort Fumble today, Geoffrey?" Despite being a councillor, Bill wasn’t a big fan of local government or regulation of any sort. He reckoned Councils were just, “a mere barnacle on the ship of progress,” but he was a useful elected member because the very best councils are made up of independent people like him who are not swayed by politics or populist thinking.

FROM Malaysia comes news of a victim of an internet online scam. It seems Ong from Seri Kembangan paid 450 Malaysian Ringgit (around $133 Australian dollars) for a penis enlarger. Imagine his disappointment when he collected his mail to find a cheap magnifying glass with a warning – do not use in bright sunlight as this may cause injury. The newspaper said Ong was unlikely to be reimbursed because technically he received what he ordered.

MEMBERS of Mittagong's popular Isedale family gathered in the Snowy Mountains last weekend to celebrate the 50th wedding anniversary of Duck and Heather Isedale at the Crackenback Resort. The former dashing young Mittagong footballer, married Heather Snowden way back in 1967, the year after we switched to decimal currency in Australia and apparently Duck still hasn't spent all of those old pound notes he had stuffed under his bed at the time. After leaving school at 14, he went to work for Bill Worner Motors in Mittagong and stayed there for his entire working life before retiring not so long ago. I reckon Duck could still fix a Volkswagen with his eyes closed. Congratulations to you both on a very solid 50 years of marriage. No mean feat indeed.

NOW for our weekly dose of humour.

Little Susie was not the best student in her primary school. Usually she slept through the class and was generally inattentive.

One day her teacher, a nun, asked her a question her while she was nodding off.

"Tell me Susie, who created the universe?"

When Susie didn't stir, Young Dud who was sitting behind her, took his pencil and jabbed her in the rear.

"God Almighty!" shouted Susie.

"Very good, Susie," said the nun, who continued teaching her class.

A little later the nun asked Susie, "Who is our Lord and Saviour?"

But Susie didn't stir from her slumber.

Once again, Young Dud came to her rescue and jabbed his very sharp pencil into her bum.

"Jesus Christ!" shouted Susie.

And the nun once again said, "Very good!" And Susie fell back asleep.

Then the nun asked her a third question.

"What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?"

Again, Young Dud came to the rescue with his sharp pencil. This time Susie jumped up and shouted,

"If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half."

The nun fainted.