THIS weekend Mittagong Public School celebrates 150 years teaching kids, prompting me to reflect fondly on my days at this fine educational institution, over half a century ago.
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I have many pleasant memories of good friends, some outstanding teachers, painful canings, fun times and heaps of sport.
ON SATURDAY night, bald old blokes and gracefully aging ladies will be swapping yarns about growing up in a very different Mittagong all those years ago.
They will relive days of playing marbles, cracker night and getting the cane. Some will remember singing God Save the Queen each morning, the dreaded milk bottles at recess, blotting paper and writing with nibbed pens dipped in an inkwell on our desk.
Others will remember collecting empty beer bottles then dragging them across the often unsealed streets of Mittagong to sell to Rex McColgan for pocket money.
They will talk of long walks to school and throwing pine cones at the catholic kids from St.Michaels at a time when only one small bus - known affectionately as the Butter Box - delivered kids to school.
YES, I imagine this weekend, there will be many tales told, much exaggerated in the foggy mists of memory.
The name Isedale will no doubt pop up in the telling of some of the best stories.
There has been an Isedale at Mittagong Public School just about continuously since the first Isedales emerged from Joadja Valley well over a century ago.
Succeeding generations of Isedales have been creating playful mischief in the schoolyard ever since.
OF ALL the Isedale's, perhaps the one that created the most havoc was Victor.
The tales he generated is the stuff of legends and I have no intention of going there, other than offer just one story to get the ball rolling.
"I'm too smart for infants school," said Victor confidently to his new teacher on his first day in second class. "I want to go straight up to primary school."
His new teacher was a pretty young thing in her first year out of the teachers college. As this was her first day teaching, she didn't really know what to do about Victor.
So she called the experienced headmistress for advice.
The headmistress came down to the classroom and decided to ask Victor some questions to test his of intelligence.
"What does a cow have four of, but a woman has only two, Victor?"
Quick as a flash, Victor answered.
"Legs."
"Correct. So what does a man have in his pants, that a woman doesn't?" asked the headmistress.
"Pockets, Miss," answered Victor.
"Correct," said the headmistress.
The pretty young class teacher pulled the headmistress to one side of the room.
"Maybe Victor should be in primary school," she said with a confused look.
"I certainly missed those first two questions you asked."
SINCE it is tall tale time, maybe I can get away with tossing in one more.
When we were in sixth class, everyone sat an aptitude test to see who may be suitable to study medicine later in life.
One of the questions we were asked was to rearrange the letters PNEIS and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.
Only one student answered SPINE.
She is now a doctor and the rest of us went on to find more suitable occupations.
WHEN Dudley went to his school reunion, he kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.
"Do you know her Dudley?" Grace asked.
"Sure do," said Dudley, "She's my old girlfriend. Apparently she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago and I hear she hasn't been sober since."
"Bloody hell!" exclaimed Grace.
"Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"
ANYHOO for those celebrating at the Mittagong reunion this weekend, have a great time and do pass on any tall tales you hear down the email line to geoff.goodfellow11@gmail.com.
